Fine...

Jun. 26th, 2006 01:09 pm
ari_o: (Default)
[personal profile] ari_o


Let's just all get this shit off our chests. I am turning on anon commenting and disabling IP address collecting.

Go ahead. Say what you need to. This is your one chance to bitch me out, etc. If you want to lecture me do it here and not on someone else's journal. And please don't dogpile on anyone.

ETA: Time is up.
IP Logging is back on. Anon commenting is off.


Date: 2006-06-26 05:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fyrie.livejournal.com
*glomps* Still love you for giving me my LJ code :)

Date: 2006-06-26 05:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
Awww, thanks. I was happy to do it. I can barely remember when you needed a code!

Date: 2006-06-26 05:23 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Words to the angry wise:

Blessed are they who mourn: for they shall be comforted.
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice: for they shall have their fill.
Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
Blessed are the clean of heart: for they shall see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

The quality of mercy is not strain'd,
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath: it is twice blest;
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes:
'Tis mightiest in the mightiest: it becomes
The throned monarch better than his crown;
His sceptre shows the force of temporal power,
The attribute to awe and majesty,
Wherein doth sit the dread and fear of kings;
But mercy is above this sceptred sway;
It is enthroned in the hearts of kings,
It is an attribute to God himself;

And earthly power doth then show likest God's
When mercy seasons justice.

When action grows unprofitable, gather information; when information grows unprofitable, sleep.

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Date: 2006-06-26 05:45 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
From experience, the wisest course of action in your case would be to silently cut ties with Offending Pals and move on. There *are* good ways to express your rage, but getting involved in the ensuing wank and cumulative bad feeling is only encouraging more of the same.

I think you have been wounded, but I worry that you will wound yourself by getting involved in drama you don't really want to be involved it.

I don't really mind signing my name to this, but hey, the opportunity to be anonymous is fun.

Date: 2006-06-26 06:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
I got involved in the wank to get info out and make the apologies I needed to. Then I became the wank. I was dragged back into it by others. There was no way I was going to be passive about that. That felt right to me. Might not to someone else. But hey, some people don't like chocolate. I'm not going to lecture them and tell them they should like chocolate just because I like it.

You are entitled to your opinion. Talking to people on JF gave me an outlet, some laughs, and a way to clear up my part in this. If you think that is not something you would do that is fine, but I am not you.

Date: 2006-06-26 05:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tx-cronopio.livejournal.com
No anonymous here. I haven't commented before, since I don't know you and did not know if you would welcome random comments. I'm a complete outsider who was drawn in by the Charlotte Lennox tales, and I've followed the comments since.

You seem to me to be one of the few folks involved who have handled the whole upset with dignity, grace and aplomb. (one so rarely gets to use the word aplomb!) I feel for you, having to go thru this, and I'm sorry it still seem to be having repercussions. I send you good wishes. Pat

Oh, and yeah, I don't know what that comment above me meant, either.

Date: 2006-06-26 06:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
Thank you. I don't think I should get praise for simply doing the right thing, which is saying, "I was wrong. I'm sorry." That is what people should do when they fuck up. But it is nice of you to say so. Aplomb is a fabulous word.

Date: 2006-06-26 06:06 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Small shy, oh my oh my
won't even try
to make something out of himself
and if you look, smile
he'll run a mile
the poor little, silly shy smurf

Say booh
you know what he'll do
he'll hide in the loo
and probably stay there all day
and if you ask why
he'll never reply the poor little, silly shy smurf

Somebody tell him he mustn't be shy
tell him he's lovely and good
Oooh oooh oooh oooh ooh, if somebody only would

Maybe we'll get him to see
he better agree

he's gotta get hold of himself
he really should, must or always be just
the poor, little, silly shy smurf
--

I couldn't help it, the other anon was just so inspiring! :)

Date: 2006-06-26 06:10 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
roffles!

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Date: 2006-06-26 06:36 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I think you and Aja are the two people mentioned in all this wank who came out if it with more people respecting you than was the case going in.

Many more.

I think a lot of the people trolling you -- probably all of them -- are the same sort who routinely say nasty crap on anonomemes just to stir things up. Like this one, who hates Hufflepuff. http://wheresthehate.livejournal.com/343.html?thread=127575#t127575

I don't expect that makes it any easier to have to deal with the rude and stupid things people say, but I think the odds of there being significant intersection between people you know and people who would act like that are pretty low.

♥.

Date: 2006-06-26 06:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
Right, except I'm being asked to turn the other cheek and forgive and forget and accused of being vicious. O_o

I tend to be bitchy and confrontational--but I'm just being me. If I were being vicious there would be a lot of stuff I would say that I haven't and won't. I would spewing vitriol. And I really haven't done that. Trust me.

I can deal with the stupid things people say. I don't mind them. I say stupid things frequently.

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no need for anon

Date: 2006-06-26 06:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 3starsinmyeyes.livejournal.com
you still rock my sox :)

i still think we all just need some more HP porn

but what do i know ;)

Re: no need for anon

Date: 2006-06-26 07:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
I haven't read HP porn in so long I think I'd be shocked! I'm sure I would blush.

because OMG I never wrote any

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Date: 2006-06-26 07:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] praetorianguard.livejournal.com
Thanks, ma'am. *shoos anonymouse off journal*

And ha, you know I'm a million times more likely to be mean and hold a grudge than you are. *snuggles*

Date: 2006-06-26 07:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
Grudge maybe because I don't hold them generally. But the mean? I think we could stalemate there, we just have different styles.

Did you see the love we gave you on [livejournal.com profile] _lore's love meme?

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Date: 2006-06-26 07:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eibbil-libbie.livejournal.com
In over four years at LJ, I've yet to leave an anonymouse comment anywhere. Not about to start now.

Still much with the love for youse.

Date: 2006-06-26 07:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
you are so adorable. I just want to put you in my pocket and carry you around NYC.

Date: 2006-06-26 08:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] koloagirl.livejournal.com
After everything you've just learned, I wouldn't give a second thought to anything said by an anonymouse. You've been hoodwinked and double-crossed and the people responsible don't have any good answer for you ("good" as meeting your requirements under the circumstances). The entire thing's been populated by sockpuppets and anonymice -- people without the guts to say what they have to say to you as themselves aren't worth your time.

Date: 2006-06-26 09:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
Right, but instead of mice following me around onto friend's ljs I thought I would give them this one time opportunity to get it out of their systems on this post. :)

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Date: 2006-06-26 08:59 pm (UTC)
moony: (Default)
From: [personal profile] moony
I think you're neat. :-)

Date: 2006-06-26 09:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
Right back at you cute girl

Date: 2006-06-26 10:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwendolen.livejournal.com
I only now caught up on the whole msscribe thing and some of the assorted wank. Wow, that is... I'm actually without words.

I find it a bit hard to believe why people now want to try and cast you into the role of the bad guy.

To some extend I can understand not wanting to believe the worst about someone you consider a friend and about taking threats seriously. It's human nature and it speaks for us that we don't assume the worst at first but act in good faith, just like you did.

Aside from that. I love your icons, especially Draco-bunny and enjoy reading your posts even though I rarely comment. **hugs**

Date: 2006-06-26 11:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] harlequincy.livejournal.com
I think you're entitled to be angry. It is draining, though, isn't it? Eventually, I'd suggest trying to mend some of the burned bridges. At the very least, it might rid you of some of your pain and anger. Grudges can be exhausting.

One more thing: If some of your pain and anxiety is coming from what you think other people are thinking and saying about you... I just want to assure you that no one in fandom should be thinking poorly of you just because of the "Msscribe Story" posted by Charlotte Lennox, or whoever. If they are, then they either read another story, or are or messed up in the head. Nothing in that series of posts paints you (or Heidi, for that matter) as a bad person, in my opinion. I think it's pretty clear that none of it was your fault. I think you're a pretty cool person. I thought that back when I was involved in fandom (about 2 or 3 years ago), and I still think it now.

It will all be OK. Don't worry.

Date: 2006-06-27 01:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
Oh I'm not worried. And I am not looking for any popularity, nevermind universal popularity.

I didn't burn any bridges. I've disengaged from some people whom it was unhealthy for me to stay in contact with.

The reason for this post was an anon who was lecturing me on other people's journals.

Date: 2006-06-27 12:03 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I'll do this anonymously so not ALL your anon comments are from bitchy sockpuppets.

You got screwed over, big time. You have an absolute right to be angry, and a right to decide whether or not you mete out forgiveness to the people who hurt you.

I say you hold on to that anger. It's yours, it's totally justified, and it's a blaring reminder to the people who burned you that what they did was wrong. Oftentimes I think people urge forgiveness and claim it's for "you," when in reality it's about their feelings of discomfort with the fact that you were angry. It's so much easier to sweep things under the rug if you "let go" of your anger.

But some things, like this, should never be swept under the rug. So be angry, and stay angry, unless that anger starts controlling you instead of the other way around, which I really don't see happening here. Healthy rage isn't a bad thing.

Date: 2006-06-27 01:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
I could not agree more. Although I find it ironic that when people preach calming down and not getting angry that it makes me pissy! Precisely because it is not about ME generally. It is about other people feeling uncomfortable with anger. Which is not my problem.

I think anger is healthy sometimes. But the real anger I had burned out pretty quickly. Now I'm just annoyed by the mouse lectures.

Date: 2006-06-27 01:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tropes.livejournal.com
You are a sexyface.


Yes I have had wine. :P

Date: 2006-06-27 04:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
You are a goofball. And I miss you.

Date: 2006-06-27 04:15 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Always sprinkle pepper in your hair,
Always sprinkle pepper in your hair.
For then if you are kidnapped by a Wild Barbazzoop,
Who sells you to a Ragged Hag
Who wants you for her soup,
She'll pick you up and sniff you,
And then she'll sneeze "Achooo,"
And say, "My tot, you're much too hot,
I fear you'll never do."
And with a shout she'll throw you out,
And you'll run away from there,
And soon you will be safe at home a-sittin' in your chair,
If you always, always, always,
Always, always, always, always,
Always, always sprinkle pepper in your hair.


Shel Silverstein

Date: 2006-06-27 04:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
I love Shel! Cause I never take the garbage out.

Date: 2006-06-27 04:16 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
About a year ago I went through a betrayal so bad the police got involved. After things settled down and emotions cooled off, certain parties did eventually apologize for their actions. While I no longer have any meaningful contact with them, the bad blood is gone.

But there's one person who I know will never apologize, or maybe even realize how much damaged they caused. I still carry much anger and bitterness toward this person. Many, maybe even most, of my friends feel I should "let it go."

But it's a process. I'm getting to point where I can finally talk It without opening the floodgates, and that's enough for me.

Date: 2006-06-27 04:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
Yeah that makes a lot of sense. And to each her own. If I had a friend who had told me that I was sad for too long about my mother dying I'd probably never speak to her again. And though this is a much less upsetting mess--I have to do it my way. I'm not sure why people don't get that. I also don't really care that they don't get that. My anger has disappated enough that it is almost funny.

Date: 2006-06-27 04:38 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Do other people routinely call the private detectives in when someone tells them their friends are lying to them? Who knew?

I guess I just don't watch enough crime dramas and daily soaps to know how to act with proper dignity.


(I'm enjoying this anonymous posting, feels quite naughty. Even though it's probably not much of a stretch to guess who's posting at times - I could add just one word here, and you'd know for sure for this comment. But I won't. )

Date: 2006-06-27 04:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
I guess if you're friends with Veronica Mars it would be easier to just have her check it out. But she is imaginary (sadly.)

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Date: 2006-06-27 07:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] doubtful-salmon.livejournal.com
Um, I don't care. Not about you. I mean I care about you, but I don't think this makes any difference at all. What I don't care about is this wank. (If I started this comment over, it would be the same sort of stupidity.)

My point is, it's only fandom. I know for some people fandom is life, right, huzzah for them, and I know you make some friends in fandom, right, huzzah for all of us who do, but in the end everyone can't be nice.

As someone safely almost uninvolved in the fandom (almost, but not entirely), I must say, ♥ for you.

Date: 2006-06-27 04:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ari-o.livejournal.com
I would prefer to not care about the wank either. But it was hard for me to not care when I was getting hammered from every direction. I realized that I could walk away from it all but that meant deleting my journals and walking away from a lot of friends and a community I've been a part of for more than six years (even if I lurked for the first two and said zilch). I chose to stay and face it unltimately.

I do not expect other people, people not directly involved, to get all up in arms or even care. And if people directly involved chose to keep mum that is their choice and none of my business. Frankly it is better if people are like you and ignore it. :)

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Date: 2006-06-27 05:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] qwertytigger.livejournal.com
I think you're lovely!

Date: 2006-06-28 12:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] imaginarycircus.livejournal.com
Well, that is very sweet. Thank you.

Date: 2006-06-27 09:40 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I feel sorry for you; for you anyone involved, and though I believe it had to come out I don't think anyone should be blamed. I know MsScribe brought it on herself, but I still feel so very, very sorry for her.

How terrible must you feel inside to believe that people will only like you if you lie to them? What was her life like that she spent hours a day online making up lies about it? Awful I'd imagine. And when you lie that compulsively, I wouldn't imagine you only lie online. By now, she must understand what she's done. Her husband must know - he'd likely tell family, real life friends. Chances are she'll end up in a psych chair over this.

I pity her.

Date: 2006-06-28 12:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] imaginarycircus.livejournal.com
I haven't said much about it but I am worried about Dionne. I can't imagine what drove her to do any of this. And I hope she is OK. It is complicated to be pissed off with someone and also worried about them--but there you have it.

Date: 2006-07-19 05:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] starswimming.livejournal.com
I am outside of all of this and don't even know you or ANYONE involved (this is sort of like my "sockpuppet" journal only... I don't really post anywhere), nor am i part of Teh Fandom, but dude, I'm sorry if you caught any shit for trying to stand up for someone that you thought was a friend. Though never a part of Teh Fandom, I was involved in some roleplaying circles online for awhile, and I've seen similar deception.

-J.

Date: 2006-08-08 06:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lisechen.livejournal.com
Wow, I'm late to the party.

Also, hi, you don't know me, but we played on the same RP-thing for a minute.

I surfed through the whole [livejournal.com profile] bad_penny thing, and yanno what?

You seem like a neat person.

I thought you should know.
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